The Boat Anchor Manual Archive

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You know You're in Vancouver when

		Thursday, March 14, 2002 10:02:33 PM
Humour
From:		Ginny Munro,AbbyNet
Subject:	You know You're in Vancouver when...
To:		Humour

You know you're in Vancouver when . . .

1. Your co-worker has 8 body piercing and none are visible.
2. You make over $250,000 per year and still can't afford a house.
3. You take a bus and are shocked at 2 people carrying on a conversation in English.
4. Your child's 3rd grade teacher has purple hair, a nose ring, and is named Breeze.
5. You can't remember because everyone grows it here, but how much pot can you legally grow at home?
6. Even though you don't condone pot smoking, you're proud that BC grows the best in the world.
7. You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown and can taste the difference between Sumatra and Ethiopian.
8. You also know which Yaletown restaurant serves the freshest arugula.
9. A really great parking space can move you to tears.
10. A man gets on the bus at Davie Street in full leather regalia and crotchless chaps; You don't even notice.
11. A woman gets on the bus with live poultry in China town; you don't even notice.
12. You carry on a daily conversation from Kootney Loop to downtown with the same drunk bum who gets off near Main & Hastings for his 9-5 shift at Pigeon Square.
12. The guy at 8:30 am at Robson Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like George Clooney IS George Clooney.
13. You know there are only 2 oceans on either side of Canada and wouldn't dream of ever wanting to see the one on the East Coast.
14. At any given time you'll see someone driving or walking down the street with a Starbucks in their hand.
15. You're so spoiled that when you look out your window and see green trees, snowy peaked mountains, part of the Pacific Ocean, the Vancouver City skyline, the temperature is mild even in the winter and everything's within an hour from your home, you yawn, close the curtains and go back to watching TV.
16. The weatherman talks about the bad weather in other parts of Canada as if we really care, but we still laugh at all the snow they get.
17. You pass an elementary school and the children are all busy with their cell phones or pagers while waiting for their personal rides home.
18. You let other Canadians believe that Toronto is the best city so that they don't all move here but only Torontonians and Vancouverites know the REAL truth.
19. The weather forecast calls for possible sunny periods, some cloudy periods, and a chance of rain showers, AND EVERY DAY ITS THE SAME!
20. The PNE is the same damn thing every year, but you still go for"those little donuts".
22. You only take the Gondola up Grouse Mountain when you have visitors over.
23. You read the front page of the Vancouver Province paper to find out what the Premier of BC did stupid yesterday and the back of the paper to see what the Canucks lost by last night.
24. The more expensive the car, the worse the driver.
25. You know an Earthquake (THE BIG ONE) is going to hit us one day but in the mean time the risk of living here is WORTH IT.

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